My Rock is the burden that I carry around when I am trapped in a conflict concerning a child that I love. It is the unanswered questions and the fears that come along with them as I struggle to keep my head above the waters of despair. It is the extra weight and baggage that slows me down as I attempt to climb the mountain before me. My Rock represents the pain that I feel for a child that is trapped in the middle of a war and the realization that my hands are tied and there is little that I can do about it. I do my best to shield them from the dangers all around them while with me, but then I am forces to release them back in the care of others I do not trust. My Rock is the weariness that I feel from the sleepless nights and the mental drain from being stuck in my worries and concerns for my child that is not in a place they should be in. My Rock is my feelings of powerlessness – my belief that I am not seen or understood or valued. My Rock is the seemingly impossible task of forgiving those that were close, and then stabbed me in the back.
My Rock does not guide me into a place of peace and rest, but is an obstacle or barrier keeping me out of my place of rest. O’ will I ever be free from the shackle that ties me to My Rock of burden and shame. How do I let it go? Every time I lay it down, I feel like I am walking away from the child who is looking to me for love and protection. So, I pick it back up, convincing myself it is the right thing to do, even though my gut and heart are screaming let it go! So, I bury My Rock deep down in my soul and I silence my heart and numb my feelings and try to pretend that everything is okay. I convince myself that there is no Rock. This is just how life is and this is just how I am supposed to feel, not realizing that many of my choices and actions are my coping mechanisms for numbing the pain that has never gone away.
Others gently try to reach out to me hoping to provide support or even answers, but every time they get to close to My Rock, my grip tightens. O’ will I lay my burdens down? Are there truths that can override my realities? Is there a way when there seems to be no way? Is there hope? Can my fears be replaced by love?
There is one who is above it all and sees it all and knows it all. He is the lover and redeemer of our souls. Despite our frailties, He was willing to give us His very own son, who while we were still in rebellion, sacrificed His life for the forgiveness of our sins. It is this amazing love that can capture your heart and deliver you from “The Rock” that weighs you down. Empowered by His spirit of love you find the strength to see and acknowledge your Rock and choose to lay it down and walk away into a newfound place of peace. Energized by the realities that He knows you, He forgives you, He holds you, He values you and He loves you, you can take a deep breath and be joyful, relaxed, positive and hopeful.
With the weight of “The Rock” gone and the knowledge of your own sins forgiven you can receive the Spirit of Forgiveness. You can release the ones who have hurt you and finally enter into your place of peace and rest knowing that the One who created it all will work it all out for your good and the good of the child that you love so much.
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